Omalee Blog

Thursday, May 2, 2019

One Night Out At The Hotel With My Hubby Saved My Marriage


Bube and I got married a little over six years ago,to be candid I wasn't the sex type. Okay I had couple of smooching and fingering before my marriage but my husband was a sex maniac,his sex drive was ten million times or so I thought, I was rigid and nervous with sex.

Bube didn't like the fact he had to be the only asking for it,I get busy with house chores after work and hit the bed afterwards leaving my husband in the living room, trying to wake me up in between sleep with his turgid manhood became a terrorizing experience every night "I don't understand you phina,young women your age sends their men to the high heavens with  ecstasy but here you are putting out my fire every moment"Bube thundered one  night,he was so charged and throbbing, I turned over to the other side  of the bed and let him pull off my night gown,it was another one sided affair, he'd almost rape me,I waited patiently for him to get it over and done with then I'd roll over to the other side and cover myself under the bedsheet.

Bube loved me dearly but my unresponsive sexual life sent him  crazily mad at me,he quarreled and nagged unnecessarily, at a point he started insinuating that I could be into lesbianism or some sort of unnatural sex ,if not why can't I fancy sex with him for one day?

I wasn't any of these,I was only   being the prude  woman who grew up under the strict guide of her mother, I was taught that sex wasn't meant for me ,that I could just get pregnant at a man's touch.

Growing into a teen we became adventurous back in high school, we sneaked out at night to play under the moonlight with boys from the neighbouring high school, I was frigid and nervous with sex,getting married didn't change that.

I watched helplessly as my husband became a stranger, he hardly disturbed me about sex and barely mentioned it ,I felt relieved and went about my life till one night.

I'd gone to bed before Bube as usual, somehow I was experiencing stomach discomfort so I woke up to take some drugs, I've opened the door to the bathroom to have a quick shower then my eyes flashed through the opening on the door of the master's bedroom where my husband spent nights lately,he was on the video talking ,I tiptoed to the door and opened it a bit more.

On the screen was a grown girl,naked as the day she was born,with her fully endowed body,Bube was naked watching her,both of them were lost in each other pleasuring themselves, the strange lady was saying the darnedest things and Bube was extremely excited, I closed my ears with my fingers,those dirty words made me so ashamed, I can't imagine myself saying them but my husband was enjoying every bit of  it,I ran back to my room and slumped into my bed,

I was disappointed in my husband, he was cheating on me with a fantasy girl,such obscenity!! But Bube wasn't moved at all,"You never wanted it and I needed it"he said unremorsefully,I felt bruised

For days I didn't talk to Bube,he also avoided me,the silence in my home was killing, I found comfort in reading stories online, then one day I read a story that looked like mine,the woman told  the story of her ordeals in her marriage due to unsatisfactory sex life and how she found solution.
I didn't realise I was doing the wrong thing,I was thinking my husband was a sex manic who does nothing than have sex and more sex.

I  Started applying those tips I read on the story, I firstly apologised to my husband and promised to  change, he apologized for his  lewd activities and we're good again.

I started asking for sex as well as responding the little way I could but it wasn't anything I enjoyed.

One weekend Bube told me that he'd love to take me along to his colleague's wedding,we packed our bags and hit the road,it was on a Friday evening, we got into the city before night and checked into a hotel,the couple welcomed us and we stayed out into the deep night for the wedding eve rituals,

Getting back to our hotel room I was feeling like a new bride,Bube was all over me,I'd say I could easily pass for a beauty Queen without sounding immodest,every part of my body was perfect,the curves and contours perfectly  in the right places.

For the first time I felt the tingling, I felt the rushes of emotions ,I felt the surge of pleasures and waves of ecstasy ran all over my veins, I felt wet in between my legs and my nipples got harder needing my husband.

I held him tightly drawing him to myself, for the first time I noticed how huge he was down there, I watched him grow in my palm,it was unusual,it was ecstatic, I guided him into me and watched him make sweet passionate love to me.
"Let's do it like this again" I whispered to Bube,he turned me over and had me again and again.

We returned home after the wedding and everything took a new turn, I became more adventurous, I searched for new techniques to better my skill,Bube was extremely happy.

We spent hours having sex I didn't know sex was this good and I didn't know I married a stud "Thanks honey for not walking away from me" I whispered into his ears one night after  an explosive sexual inter course,"I love you honey "he replied and covered my lips in a wet kiss,we spent time making torrid love all night long.
Read More »

Tuesday, April 30, 2019

The Poison My Man Gave Me(You Think You've Been Betrayed By Love? Wait Till You Read My Story)



If I didn't date Theo before  accepting his marriage proposal ,maybe by now everybody would be calling for my head  and saying stuff like "You just met a guy and married him" or "How can you marry a man you barely know?", but this was a guy I met in my university days.

I was in 200 levels when Theo came into my life, getting admission into the prestigious university of Ibadan was a dream come true for me,I was barely 17 years and top most  on my mind was to excel in my study and make my dad proud, off to Ibadan I went  to study  medicine clutching this at the back of my mind..

The lest thing on my mind was a love affair, I was naive and a novice in the game of love, even Theo noticed and asked severally'how a beautiful intelligent young girl like me was that prude?", it was rare according to him" young girls my age were already  involved in series of relationship ",but I wasn't, I was brought up in a godly family ,my mother taught me and my three younger sisters to fear God and stay away from immorality, I had few male friends but they were just boys in my neighbourhood and it was merely platonic friendship.

Caught in the bustling university environment, girls go out with guys without qualms, it was gradually becoming normal for a girl to hang out with a guy unlike what was obtainable in the Ikeja area of Lagos where I lived, parents were always on the look out for their girl-child.

Theo crept into my heart with his endearing ways,he visited me everyday, gave me lovely gifts,he took me to the park every weekend and wrote beautiful texts for me,I enjoyed every moment we spent and I could not stop myself from falling head-over-heels in love with him.

We started dating and life was good, Theo made my stay in the university fun,he loved me and treated me  with special affection, he's four years older than me so he treated me like a younger sister and I loved him very much,he graduated before me but I didn't feel it,his family lived in Ibadan so he continued  the visitation ,this time it was more exciting because he brought me food from his house and took me  out to inside town,his love increased day by day

I was lost in Theo and I didn't realise I didn't visit home in Lagos for a whole session! my parents were worried, my mom refused to accept the explanation I gave her about having loads of project to tackle ,she insisted I should tell her the truth, as her first daughter we shared a lot in common, I opened up to my mom and told her everything  about my relationship with Theo,my mom reluctantly accepted him but cautioned me seriously and advised I should not throw away my virtues.

So it was normal for my family to accept Theo when he came with his family to ask for my hand in marriage, he got a Job  immediately after his graduation in a multi-national firm and he was living fine,both family have come together over the years to become close knitted, our relationship was the sweetest.

We got married the traditional and church way and started living together, I married my heartthrob and life just begun,it was in the time of my housemanship,I was three months pregnant ,Theo's company sent him for a course overseas,he was to spend four months,it wasn't easy for me to let him go considering my condition but it was  for his growth and the better life of our family "we will soon welcome our baby ,we need to make life comfortable for our future kids,I need to work hard and this course will help open a new chapter in my life" Theo said *Let me go Baby,I will keep in touch regularly, you can trust me on that "he continued.

Oh yes I trusted Theo, he's always been the doting,caring and loving man,he called, texted,sent money regularly, he made sure his sister visited regularly to help me out, when my pregnancy got into the seventh month which was the month Theo was supposed to come back,he convinced my mom to come stay with me.

Theo told me there was an opportunity for him to settle down in Europe and work with his company's head office, he pleaded and explained it was for our good,I accepted, he said once he settled down he'd  bring me over to join him.

Labour came and I had my baby,a beautiful baby girl,she looked so much like her father, Theo wasn't around me to welcome his first fruit,he watched me through video and followed up everything.

From the first day my beautiful daughter Cheery arrived, she became my world,I loved her with all of me,I gave her double portion of love,Theo kept procastinating his home coming,today he'd  tell me that  he's  having  issues with  papers,tommorrow  it will be his residence permit it felt horrible.

I finished from school and got a job at the university teaching hospital, It was difficult coping without my husband around, our daughter was growing rapidly, my mom  was so helpful, she told me stories and cited examples of women who went through similar path and  told me to keep holding on,I got used to life without my husband close by,I made do with seeing him on the video and hearing his voice.

My daughter Cheery clocked 8 on March 12th ,it was two days after her 8th birthday that she saw her father for the first time,I was in the hospital when my phone rang and my driver was on the line,he said I should speak with   "Oga" "which Oga?" ,my mouth hung with my husband's voice filtering into  my ear,Theo!?what? how?I screamed and ran out of my office, the patients and staff ran out staring at me to find out what's happening, there at the car space my husband stood,arms akimbo, he looked every inch his handsome  huge self,more lovely he looked, I jump into his wide spread arms and screamed even more.

No word could describe my feelings, why didn't he give me prior information? he said it was not planned and he wanted to pull a beautiful surprise, it didn't matter anyway, I have my husband and that's it.
The next one week was carnival for me and my daughter, she asked her father million questions at once and told him million stories at once, I took one month leave so I could enjoy my husband, my director understood and granted me,everybody was happy for me.

We came in from an outing, it was on the tenth day after my husband's return, he was in the bedroom with our daughter and I was in the kitchen fixing fruit juice for our deserts then my phone rang, it was a woman's voice, unfamiliar but she sounded friendly, she called my name "Naomi" she said she's happy to finally speak to me,she said her name was Agatha and she's my husband Theo's wife, she said they've been married for seven years and had three kids between them,two daughters and a son,she said she knows about me and Cheery and she knows that I dont know anything about her and her kids.


I didn't know how I managed to get to  my room but it was  a hammer blow, Theo stuttered all through but the truth was glaring, Agatha was right, all those years Theo was telling me stories of him having paper issues, he married an Afro German and lived  having kids with her,for seven years,he lived with another family and never bothered to tell me.

It was God who kept me alive, I fainted from time to time,I gasped for breath,my family rallied round and  supported me.

Its been over one month now and am yet to make a meaning out of the whole thing.Theo kept apologising but it doesn't change anything, he betrayed me and stabbed me in my heart,he ridiculed trust and made nonsense of love and loyalty, he disrespected me and I promised him hell,he has plans to travel back to europe,definitely  to continue living with his other family in Europe while I stay in Nigeria as his "Nigerian wife",he bought a new house and asked me to move in with my daughter and promised to never let me lack,

I  will never forgive him,if it means going to hell I'm ready to go to hell rather than forgive Theophilus.
Read More »

Thursday, April 25, 2019

Let's Get Married (2)


It's Sunday afternoon at the Caribbean  and the serenity is alluring,we  slept all through the  morning cut to  a tiring tour we embarked on,I have little fright for  water but  Nazry was  my cover,my life jacket 😁😁
We have a date for  dinner  two of us are our  own crowd. I have  a long hair on,a weave-on,Nazry loves seeing  my hair wrapped back 'this Jewish jaw  God gave you should be appreciated",he'll always say. Just pack the hair all back so I will be seeing your beautiful face very well" .this evening is one of such days he'll  complain about  my long hair so I decided to loosen it and use  my Afro -wig instead.

I was in the restroom removing  my weave -on when  Nazry came in. 'how long is this going to last?" he  asked leaning on the wall ,his two hands in the pocket of the denim  Jean he  wore'30 minutes maybe "I said, 'let me help you out ' he said bending over to hold my hair,"don't worry baby,I  will soon finish"I said  holding his hands to stop him  "I insist" he said still holding my hairs,Nazry loves insisting as long as its me he feels I am stressing  myself ,I know  he'll  win at the end so I allowed him ,he'll delay anyway because he'll touch  my cheek. draw  my nose,my mouth. In fact we'll sleep in there.

Just like I know he spent so much time but finally got the weave -on off. I checked the water and it was on. 'I think I will shower immediately 'I said looking up to stare at him. My !! he looks so cute on his casual  denim shorts,exposing his broad chest,'you're so cute sweetheart 'I said  running  my fingers all over his chest(he has  tiny hairs everywhere. "I love you baby "I said again, Nazry was just smiling "I love you more baby"'he said,that's one part I don't agree with him,he'll always say he loves me more,he doesn't know what he  means to me.

No words can describe how I feel each time I think of him and the fact that I have him in  my life  spurs  me to  great lengths. I have to bath  on the tepid shower. Nazry likes  very cool water.

Throwing off  my towel I started mixing  my tablet and liquid soap. 'he was still standing looking at me .i know he'll ask to help me out  but I am not going to let him do it, why would he always come close to tease me  knowing very well he won't do more than that?my  mind went back to the very first day we had our bath together.

It was almost two years ago, our relationship was about  four months old and I was always shy undressing  before  Nazry, he will talk about every part of my body and how beautiful  they are, me on the other hand will be praying he should touch me. Just one little touch.,maybe this thought will go away.,since it's not forthcoming I prefer using the second room where I will be alone,so on that day,I was in the bathroom and he  came in . I quickly rushed to cover  myself with the towel  but he  bursted into laughter. 'you're still covering yourself?",he asked. "I am going to take off that towel and give you a clean shave down there " he said ,"goodness  me ' I screamed  and held  my towel tightly .

"Please  sweetheart don't 'I pleaded with him 'you know I will do just that  so relax 'he said. I almost passed out. Nazry? going to that part of me? Oh my. why is he doing this  now? I asked  no one in particular, he came close and held  me. I held him and  closed  my eyes. I didn't want to  see him  do that,all  I feel  is  the sensation  building up inside  me as he used  the  shaving  blades .I refused  to open  my eyes,my head was spinning. 'open your eyes 'he said  'no I won't ' I replied "open it and look at this thing I want to show you" he said and  that got me and I opened  my eyes,immediately  Nazry  bent down and kissed  my  navel  down to the region he just  cleaned up. I held  my breath and  my tummy shrinked.

"Goodness me"  I muttered to  myself ,"you'll kill me, "go on with the bath darling, I love you dearly " he said and started walking away. I stood there looking at him walk out into the  master's bedroom,what kind of a guy  is this? I found  myself smiling and thinking aloud.

So when he stood staring at me this afternoon my  mind was racing,what's going on in his  mind? what surprise does he want to pull out this time? I was asking  myself 'I don't  need a shave you know 'I told him,trying to be smart,he started laughing 'I didn't say  you do baby. 'I am only admiring you",Nazry said

Time in the bath was about an hour and some  minutes. Nazry took the sponge and helped me,after which I helped foam his back. 'I will shave your beards tomorrow " I said as I pour  liquid soap all over him,"you know I  will  be leaving tomorrow.,you'll still stay till next sunday 'he said and  my face dropped. I didn't remember  he'll be rushing  back to  Nigeria  monday  night .'I will go with you" I said,he laughed and lifted  me up and  carried  me into the room,we have to dress up and leave for the resort,It's about 20 minutes drive  from the hotel and the driver is already waiting .
Read More »

Tuesday, April 16, 2019

: Frienemies. Our Beautiful -Enemies >



 'Emma Ugolee wrote"Keeping frienemies is yet one of the lousiest concepts known to mankind "

Frienemeies (plural) a person with whom someone is friendly despite fundamental dislike or hatred.
'there exists companions disposed to break one another to pieces 'proverbs 18:24

The ironic co-existence of companionship and ill -wishes beats my mind
that a pair or group of people will be classified as friends for unmistakable reasons of how well they seem to get along and yet will nurse a well fed 'bad belle ' that cannot wait to see evil befall the other party is one too weird for my comprehension .clearly it takes legendary hypocrisy to sustain that companionship .this ones must have inspired the saying 'with friends like this who needs an enemy '?

On the flip side .a lot of people seem to enjoy this 'eye service ' kind of companionship. 'they are not for me yet I am doing well 'they see it as an energy booster,struggling within themselves just to prove the point that 'those who are for me are greater than those who are against me '
'let my enemies live longer and see what I would be in future" becomes the slogan. for those dwelling in this scenario ',what if the evil machinations catches you unawares? It'll take someone closer to you to unearth your jewels.surrounding ourselves with people of goodwill not only gives us peace. It keeps our minds at rest and helps us channel our energy into productive ventures rather than spending our time searching for phrases that could convey our mind's constructions to this group of people .

'Severing ties like that would portray more honour and dignity by my reckoning ' the veteran Presenter continued
Whatever happened to dinning with a long spoon once the devil is spotted. .?

So when next you have the need to put up the status'your plans will not work'on your BBM, WhatsApp,
Facebook and other social media space in reference to someone please ask yourself firstly 'what is the fellow doing on my contact list?"
Stop setting yourself up,lose bad company enough of the smiles on the face that brings stabs on the back. Let them go

Emma Ugolee is a seasoned TV host,A writer and the producer/presenter of the "all entertainment" talkshow "the gist" showing on hiptv channels 324 on dstv and 74 on gotv.
Read More »

Monday, April 15, 2019

After Six Years My Boyfriend Still Won't Propose.


Hello Chioma,
 I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 6 years and would consider us to be very serious. whenever I try and talk about marriage he doesn't like it and tells me to stop focusing on it, I love him so much and know he is the one for me why after all this time won't he ask me if he loves me the way he says he does which is unconditionally then I don't understand.I am 28 and he is 35,we are both working and earns salaries that can keep us comfortable.

My response

Alright honey, let’s break down your situation here before we start worrying about the proposal itself.

 You said that you consider your relationship of 6 years to be very serious?. Let’s say that one more time—YOU consider a relationship of 6 years to be serious. I would hope it is more than consideration you have at this point seeing  how long you have been together that statement should be a declaration of a known fact, that you are very serious and you both know that.

You said he tells you he loves you unconditionally?—he is lying, he loves you with conditions   and it is all about what is acceptable to him  in your relationship, and apparently talking about marriage is not one of those things. If he is telling you to stop focusing on marriage, it’s because he isn’t.

What would that marriage look like anyways? You being told what you can and can’t talk about, I'm wondering if he  has emotionally invested in this relationship, and all aspects of life being played out on his timeline, probably isn’t the healthy,loving relationship you are hoping for here,then again maybe that’s your thing.

But damn— assuming your little one comes in to tell you this same  story ,just pause and give her a reply,  I sure  hope you won't tell her to stick with this man because that is an awful story.
There's a huge difference between "trying to see how" and "not even thinking of it"

 I say forget the proposal, forget the relationship,Run. Run as fast as you can and one day you might turn around and see someone way better than this guy  has chasing you and you were busy wasting time,and I mean that in the good way—not the scary, rapey kind of way.

How long  are you  going to be in a broken relationship? how long are you going to  hold  brief  for a broken who   has no plans for the future with you?

You're  definitely  blocking  space for other people that  will  get attracted to you  by holding on to a baseless relationship.

Six years  isn't  6 months  .

He is committed to wasting you, if he isn't talking about marriage after 6 years then what's his plans?he won't talk about it and he won't let you talk about it too?

Tell him you're done and leave except you also don't have good plans for your relationship.

Supporting You
 Chioma
Read More »

Friday, April 12, 2019

4 Reasons Women Should Not Sleep With Panties On And Recommendations


Of all the parts of a  woman's body the vagina is the most delicate and  should be  handled with utmost carefulness.

Unfortunately most women don't know how to  take care of  their  vagina,"I found out I don't even know how to wash my vagina very well" a client once complained ,but  this article is not   meant to discuss about "how to wash the vagina" ,I have written something on that previously,

Being mindful of the what it takes to maintain good hygiene is the starter,knowing it's improper to wear certain materials  and knowing the right things to do  to help maintain a healthy vagina is the focus.

The vagina needs good ventilation therefore it is not appropriate for a woman to wear panties to bed,if a woman wants to keep a fresh healthy vagina then she shouldn't sleep with her panties on,not putting on panties at night after  bath   helps  to keep the vagina area dry.
(1) wash your vagina with mild toilet soap during bath,dry the area with clean dry towel and wear your lingerie or night gown.

Wearing tight jeans and leggings have health risks, these are in tune with  today's fashion but the health implications should be considered

(1)Avoid tight underwear to help  prevent vaginal infections
Tight and synthetic underwear cause the vagina to overheat and this could disrupt it's ecosystem
(b)it could trap warmth and moisture making the vagina vulnerable to infections.

(c)it can cause  vagina area to overheat and this can cause burning sores,itching or irritate the sensitive skin,it can as well  cause blisters,when we walk friction takes place,if one is putting on tight jeans or polyester underwear,the friction caused by walking on tight pants can  irritate the skin resulting to the formation of blisters

(d)vaginal   burning and itching  leads to vaginal discharge and this   is one of the major causes of  foul vaginal odor
(e)this infections when left untreated could lead to infertility as  it could damage the reproductive organ.

Recommendations

(1) Use cotton underwear  to enable sufficient ventilation of the vaginal area and eliminate infections.

(2)Cotton underwear helps to keep the vagina free of excessive moisture and allows the area to breathe

(3)use cotton menstrual pad,cotton absorbs excess moisture and removes build up heat from the area,cotton is the only material that can become stronger when wet and it's easily sterilized after use.

(4)Don't sleep at night wearing panties to keep  the vaginal area dry throughout the night and keep the vagina free from diseases.

If you have any concern / you have questions to ask or you want to learn more about vagina care you can send me mail chicrystal90@gmail.com


Supporting You
    Chioma
Read More »

Thursday, April 11, 2019

8 Sure Signs They Are The Right One.


So what happened to you? You wake up to reply to his or her  text messages in between sleep ?you're obviously in love and you miss this individual a lot,it is okay but that's not all,there are  more .

 If you  realise all of a sudden that you can comfortably be you  in this person's company to the extent you share your ugly part without  being  scared of giving yourself out too much,and this individual isn't even bothered about the things you call 'ugly",this individual doesn't shame you ,but always willing to be part of your good and bad side,then you have got a score for a significant other.

You can spend times together without saying a word ,but you're comfortable, you stop being afraid when this individual isn't saying anything, you know the both of you can share unspoken words in your subconscious

You become trusting, even in the midst  of  activities you didn't understand, you're always patient to hear them out firstly,and this individual definitely  gives explanations without feeling boxed in,a huge point for a significant other.

You're not afraid to show your emotions, your vulnerability is an energy ,for this individual   will protect you in all around rather than take advantage of  what you feel,buddy score this a point for a  significant other.

You're not in any competition,you're excited for their accomplishment,you support them and you treat their glories like it's your own,it's exactly what you get in return.

You fight for your relationship, knowing nothing in life is smooth and easy,you see this individual standing with you to protect what both of you have,not any one of you is losing interest in  seeing you become an item,it's a relationship worth having ,you're holding tight to it because it's a huge point for a significant other.

Making each other happy is the priority in your relationship,everything suddenly become spontaneous, morning texts, midnight check ups,you are always excited about them.

You're respecting each other's needs,giving space isn't a big deal for you, normally having alone time is important to every individual, for in such moment we let out  some stress and we're able to curate our dreams and find out what inspires us.,been able to understand and respect these part  of human life in your relationship is a huge point for a significant other.

I'm not saying it's a sure 100% guarantee for a roller coaster  healthy relationship but over 80% marriages that kicked up having these  attributes as  reference  surpassed autumn years.

Supporting You

Chioma
Read More »