Omalee Blog

Tuesday, June 4, 2019

Wrong Dating,I Know Everything Is Wrong About Loving Him But I Don't Want To Stop.

Lovers out on a date.

You have ever been with a wrong  date?Have you ever loved someone so deeply that it  felt like your life is worthless without them?they lied to you severally yet you accepted it and wished it's the truth?

The lies were so much because he needed to conceal his identity, he refused to change his relationship status on Facebook because he wanted to hide the truth,I found out all of these ,still I can't keep away from him.

"Cheryl  you're a fool" my immediate younger sister spat out at me,I know but I was cool with that, Franklin  was my life and that's all I cared about, ours wasn't a healthy relationship but It's the sweetest I have had and I loved him like no other

 I fell in Love with Franklin, you know the early morning text and late night conversations at weekends. He crept into my heart with his dotting and caring.Franklin was  an amazing dude,his charisma and confidence  was out of this world.

He lived in Saudi Arabia and I lived in the UK,his busy schedule as a medical doctor gave him little space for traveling so we made do with calling and messaging.

Holiday came and we agreed to travel  for the winter  break  .we're from the same country but different States, We  met in London and travelled home together, we got into the capital territory and decided to spend two days before  leaving for our various home,till date it remained the best two days to remember,

I knew Franklin was caring but staying closer to him   made me realise the gem I got in a man,it was a love filled-fun packed breathtaking two days,simply put Franklin was sweeter than honey,more romantic than Romeo,

It was hard for us to leave each other's company but we had to because it was the festive  period and we had to meet up  with our different  families.Reluctantly he returned to his state  while I traveled to my own state, we agreed to meet  two days after Christmas day..

Two days to the day we scheduled to meet Franklin called me to tell me that  we should postpone the appointment because of some family engagements he needed to fix,he hasn't been home in the past two years so everybody  was  waiting for him.

I cried like a baby,he pleaded with me and   asked   that I should understand and bear with him, I've gotten used to Franklin keeping me company ,on the phone though, that visit was the needed opportunity for us to spend  more real time together and see if something real could happen between us for good.I was heartbroken.

After Christmas celebration he told me we could meet on 3td January, again he cancelled it,I didn't find any word that could describe how horrible I felt.My younger sister didn't find it funny at all, she felt I had too much expectations and I was being over dependent on a guy I had  no solid relationship with.

I clinged  to my sister and saw the holiday to an end,with the festive period over, I packed my stuff and headed to Lagos ,I'd spend few days in Lagos before traveling back to the UK,Surprisingly Franklin  showed up,he  apologized,gave all manner  of excuses and promised to be good, at this point my gut already warned me to be careful.

I was careful though but Franklin was exceptionally good.He was  kind,caring and amazingly romantic,I can say I was lost in lust for him

It wasn't  easy for me to keep him away from me,once his eyes locked with mine.I'd  melt and get  consumed in his endearing passion . I believed he  was truly crowded so I forgave him.

Back in Europe life continued .I enjoyed his  endless doing.He gave me everything and more,He wouldn't tell me much about his family "I'm the person in love with you and not my family" Franklin would tell me whenever I asked questions about his immediate family, I'm good in respecting boundaries so I'd always leave talks about his family out of our discussions

One evening my sister sent a message that I should come on WhatsApp ,I did and she sent me two photographs. I opened it and saw Franklin carrying a new born baby with the caption "Thank God for his blessings.Little Hildah is here"

There's no denying it,Franklin was married.

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Monday, June 3, 2019

How To Know If He Is In To Build A relationship After A first Date Or He Is Only Dating For Fun.

A young girl who got frustrated after a first date

It's your first time falling in love after your first date,and he's not keeping up.You're already worried about if he's in to build a relationship with you or he's merely out  for fun dating.

Maybe you've been in love  at other times or you've been with your boyfriend for  a period   and  he stopped  giving attention to  the relationship .

Every woman wants to feel safe in her  relationship ,what is considered the most powerful key to creating a  healthy relationship is Communication.

But what happens when he suddenly goes cold?knowing it's almost impossible to  build trust in a relationship without constant communication, you become  worried,panic could set in and  you start experimenting so many tips in a bid  to save your relationship and get the man you love back to you.

It is still okay to put in effort to build your relationship and restore lost love, but have you asked yourself this one question,"Does he truly love me and want to be with me?".
It's one billion dollar question a lot of women try hard to avoid, yet it's a decider to what you're fighting to have.if a man  is dating a woman  or they're getting to meet for a first date,definitely he'd be all up on her face,he'd work hard to get her excited so that she'd love to go out with him,but what  is the motive behind his request?

You may never know if there's no communication, he may hang around for awhile and you've fallen hopelessly in love with him and you'd  think you can't go a day without him,when he's leaving unannounced you'd even be  scared to accept he's not the one for you.

"No I'm not just doing enough" most women say this a lot of times,many will still  be willing to put more effort even when it's staring them in the face that "He doesn't just want you".

I'm not a kill Joy ,I'm only trying to help,I was somewhat like that. I met and fell hopelessly in love with a guy who had no intention of staying with me.I was doing all the loving ,from  our first date I thought  I have met my prince charming,I started putting in so much work  to build a healthy relationship with him but he was carefree, eventually he severed all form of  communication,I lost my sense chasing him,I broke my head in attempt to save a relationship that was not Loyal,I was Lucky to come out of it but I was bruised.

How Do You Know When The Guy You Just Met Or Your long Time Boyfriend Is In For A Real Thing Or He's Only Out For A Headwash?

I did a little experiment and it worked.
After many weeks of 'chasing' boo .I got tired of his empty promises of returning my calls and text messages, I curled up  ,I stopped calling and texting,I stopped visiting too,it was not easy but I held on  and after one month it became clear he never wanted to keep me.

Pause for sometime,give him space, don't call .don't text,maybe for days or week,just give him 5 days or one week,no nothing then see if he'd come back.

You'd definitely ask "what if I can't wait for five  days?,I love him and I'm missing him "
When did he become  the breath you breathe? It is still okay to miss the same time you can miss them and still move on,The thing is you keep chasing him and he runs off on it,he knows you'd keep coming for him,why not put your hands off your keyboard and put your legs inside your house and make him realize it's really serious and he's at the risk of losing you?

"What if he doesn't come back?then why would you want to  be with someone like that? Why would you want to be with someone who doesn't want you?someone who cares nothing about losing you?
He obviously had no plan of  building a relationship with you therefore it's so wise to let him go  so you can clear space to welcome a conscious love.
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Saturday, June 1, 2019

MEN ROUNDTABLE (It's The UEFA Champions League Final,Who Are You Rooting For?)

It's the UEFA Champions league final tonight at the  Wanda Metropolitano stadium in Madrid Spain,

The 67,000 seat capacity stadium is the home ground to Spanish club Athletico Madrid  and will play host to  two  teams from the English premier league, Liverpool and Tottenham Hotspurs, making it an All English Affair.

The last  time two teams from the English top flight played at the UCL finals was in 2008 at the Luzhniki stadium in Moscow ,this final was between Manchester united and Chelsea with Manchester united winning on penalty shoot out,

As history is about to repeat itself,Men Roundtable   spoke with some football professionals ,football lovers and club fans.

Tijani Babangida,ex international Ajax Amsterdam And Super Eagles Of Nigeria

Where will You be watching the game tonight?

Well am going to watch the game with  my son and few friends .
 My son loves football but he supported ajax
am sure he is neutral tonight.

Who are you rooting for?

For me am neutral as well Just going to watch the game without tension ,Going to enjoy it.

Thanks for talking to Men Roundtable..
My Pleasure

Mutiu Adepoju ,ex international Real Sociedad and Nigeria Super Eagles

The one we call "The Headmaster",Where will you be watching the game tonight?

I will be watching at home.

Does Your partner like football

Yes she  likes football but not a fanatic

How does she feel seeing you engrossed in the round leather game?

She doesn't feel any bad because she knows it's what I did as a profession.

Who are you rooting for?

I Will like Liverpool to win it this time.

Thanks for talking to Men Roundtable

You're welcome.

We cornered some football lovers and asked them how they're feeling as the countdown is getting to the climax.

As history is about to repeat itself tonight, Men roundtable wants to know.

1 Does your partner like football?
2Where will you be watching the game tonight.
3,Who are you rooting for

4,How does your partner feel seeing you engrossed in the round leather game?

Celestine Dozie is a London based Lawyer and a diehard Chelsea fan.

I will be watching at home,,my wife is not a diehard fan of any club,she feels Jealous and all of a sudden she will claim to be a Man United fan just to get under my skin.
I'm rooting for Liverpool.

Abalike Agbo is a  Rev father of the Catholic diocese of oturkpo currently studying psychology at the  Gregorian University Rome Italy.
I love talking with father but father is not a football Club  fanatic.

I am not  really a football  club fanatic, I will be watching  at home
I am generally a fan of football and not a fan of a football club. I look out for the best and cheer them. Is the professionalism displayed that I cherish
I am  happy and celebrates with the team that has the day

I got two Liverpool fans on the line .it was excitement all the way for them.

Dana Joseph is a diehard Liverpool fan.

Men Roundtable-You are a liverpool fan,how are you feeling? your club will  be coming face to face with Tottenham hotspurs another English side tonight 
for the UCL final?

I'm very optimistic about this game. We're going for victory. Tottenham Hotspur is a fine team with good team spirit just like Liverpool but we are more experienced than them in European championship. Having beaten Barcelona, I'm sure we're out to make history one more time because it's on record that all the times that we had beaten Barcelona in a European championship, we   always go ahead to win the trophy.
The game will definitely be an interesting one, no one is to be seen as an underdogre

Where will you be watching the game?

I wanted to stay back at  home and watch but the fun will be less. So I'm going all out to watch with friends in a chilly spot.

Talking about fun,does your partner like football?,how does she  feel seeing you engrossed in the round leather game?

She's not a fan of football but at least we strike a balance over my passion for football. So she's fine with that.

In case your club fails to win,will you be ready to accept defeat?

We won't lose. However, if it happens then we'll live to fight another day. We lost the last time and accepted it that's why we are here today. It's a game.

Thank you Joseph for talking with Men roundtable.

It's a pleasure

 Julia Chioma is a woman but she loves football a lot,a diehard Liverpool fan.

Men Roundtable-You are a woman and a football lover,a Liverpool fan,your club is playing in the UCL final,how do you feel?

I am excitedI feel like I'm in cloud nine
I feel like I fell in love for the first time
Like a bride to be married to her groom,I feel butterflies inside me

What  are  your expectations?

I expect a good game from the lads and the trophy at the end of the match

What if Liverpool loses the game,will you accept defeat?

They won't lose,
But I will accept the defeat
because this is not just any team for me, it's a family

Where will you be watching the game?

I will be watching at home

Nice talking  with you Julia.

Thanks .

Wow wow wow,its heated up,full to the brim and about to burst,who are you putting your money on?its "Road To Madrid" share your thought (s) on the comment section.

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Friday, May 31, 2019

My First Transactional Intimacy(He Refused To Pay Me But We Had An Agreement)

I lost my dad few years ago,because he was the sole provider for the family life became pretty hard for us.

Picking up the pieces,we started  fishery business and that's how we've been surviving,but along the line  the business crashed due to  vaccination failure.

And that was how we lost everything , since then my mum hasn't been doing anything there's no money to come back into business .

I'm in my 200 levels in the university currently and I'm running a part time Job …I do daily contribution also ,my salary is twelve thousand naira, that is what I use for transport fare  for me and my sister  and to take care of our needs. 
My boyfriend supports also even though he's not well to do.

There's one of my customers who's been disturbing me since,he's married,so on wednesday  there was nothing at home,no gas and foodstuff, the guy called as usual and  I agreed to meet up,my reason was to beg him for some  money then pay back when I can.

When I got there we got talking and he said he can give me 20k oh well that's a lot for me right now and he said he doesn't want a refund he wants sex.
We dragged and I was like okay,at least the money can fill gas and buy some foodstuff before I get paid
We got intimate but instead of giving me the amount we agreed on,the guy started saying he'd call me the next morning to give me the money,I was like " Bros that's not our agreement " 
That was  my first transactional sex .He said he doesn't have money on him that he'd call me and there was nothing I could do.He gave me one thousand naira for transport fare
He said  that he doesn't have the money now,that he'd call me in the evening to give me.I didn't get his call ,when I called he didn't take my call ,after I called severally and he didn't pick up I had to call him with a different number as he heard my voice he ended my call

I just realised he blocked my number this morning
Sincerely  I feel so stupid right now

It's not as if I sit at home and do nothing,I'm a student plus I'm also doing daily contribution .

I can't get a good paying job right now because nobody wants a part time worker,
The whole thing is just so annoying.

Admin's Note-I took the Guy's number from her and called him,he didn't deny though he said he hasn't paid because he's having troubles that held him back.

But I told him that it's unfair of him,he knew he had no money on him but he didn't tell her instead he lied just to get what he wanted.
I told him he must pay all the money,it's a transaction and the agreement stands,
Before this publication the girl called me and told me he sent her five thousand naira .
I cautioned her seriously and told her to desist from such act,she is above 18 and she gave her consent.

What's your thought? Share on the comment section.
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Thursday, May 30, 2019

MEN ROUNDTABLE(Episode 1) Does 1+1 Come Into Play In The Issue Of Money?

          Welcome To Men Roundtable.

This week we are discussing; Financial Discipline On The Part Of  Our Partners And How We React To Women Attitude Towards Spending ( Women and Money)

It's believed that 1+1 is 1 in the algebra of love, so I'm asking

 (1) Will you let  the   woman  in your life have access to your money ?
(B) Will she have freedom to  spend your money whenever she's in need without your permission?
(C) How would you react when she spends more than you ordinarily would  allow?

Elvis Alex, Canada based information communication technology specialist has this to say
 Yes, she's among the reasons I  am making the money

 I will make sure She  has enough to take care of  her needs. What if I wasn't available?. I don't want her to be calling me anytime she needs money.
. Depends on what she spent it on, I don't think there is a limit to what someone can spend. The issue will be on what she spent it on.

We will  have a discussion to find out why she used the money if it's a large sum  and if she needed to use that much.Bottom spouse has everything right to my savings.

Abalike Agbo Psychologist based in Rome Italy
1) Yes  because even if she asked me I will give her
B ).  This depends on. Love comes with responsibility or responsibility is attached to love , She must inform me even if she has taken already so that accountability is maintained.

C)Reactions will not help any matter and proper planning and  budgeting is necessary. We can't spend more than we earn. So she can't spend more than  what is allowed. Besides  we plan together.

Dana Joseph  works in a private sector in Benue state Nigeria

Yes I will
B. She will have liberty to spend whenever she needs money but she should  inform me beforehand unless  it's an emergency. That kind of emergency that makes logical sense.

C) If it was necessary then it's fine but if not then I'll frown at it.

Anonymous Respondent.

Yes I will allow a woman in my life access to my money.

I wouldn't allow her to use my money without my permission. I would also not want to spend her's without her permission unless in case of emergency both ways.
I will not be happy if she spends more money than budgeted.
If there is legitimate reason I will understand otherwise I would not like it.

Kunle , Journalist Lagos 
1.She has limited access to my money.
2.  She's to have my consent to spend.
3. She gets tutored on financial discipline.

So what's your take? Are you going to let her  spend as much as she wants to or there are limits?keep the conversation going.
Enjoy the rest of your day and beyond.

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Wednesday, May 29, 2019

GIRlS TALK (Episode 1) When Do You Know You Are In Love?

Romantic love which is what we are looking at is the kind of love that exists between a man and a woman. It is hugely controlled by emotions, passion and desire. It is the feeling of attraction between the opposite sex , the Greeks called it "madness of the gods" .Romantic love mostly leaves  the  people in it without choice, it is swift and breezy, most people believes one really have no hold on when love can happen to them,but it's strongly believed that we usually have control over whom we choose to be in love with.

So when do you know you are in love?

You're sure you're truly in love with  this guy,you're putting in work but he feels indifferent. He's not showing signs of mutuality and his intentions aren't clear.How would you handle this?

Girls Talk  took opinions of these beautiful young women and these are what they have to say.

 I am Kemza Timmy,29  and A Fashion Designer.
OK for me I know I'm in love  when I think about a guy more than anything else, I feel the urge to be with him often and when I smile unknowingly at his calls then I know I love him.

Girls Talk-So You know you're in love with him,you're putting in effort to make the relationship work but he's  not  doing enough, What would you do?

 If I have put in work to make a guy actually ask to date me and he is not acting like he sees me the only thing I will do is to let him be, I will try to avoid him and with time the feelings will disappear,  this senario has happened to me before. It's difficult to let go and sometimes it could make a person feel worthless but when you find someone else you will be good and look back and be glad the other guy did not even give in

Admin-So like a disappointment being a blessing in disguise?

Something like that

Girls Talk-Admin please one quick one

Admin- okay

Girls Talk-Which is more difficult,Letting go or starting again? 

Admin-Why not ask the girls?I'm not eligible to participate. 

Girls Talk lol,thanks ma'am  Let's meet the beautiful woman next  on the line.

 I am Fatima Binta Idris,I am 25 years  and a Legal Practitioner.

Girls Talk -So When Do You Know You're In Love

I know i am in love when hearing from "him" via calls or texts lightens my mood. I  know Iam in love when he is the first person I want to call always and I stop working on my backup plans. Most times when I find myself going through previous chats with that smile on my face and butterflies in my stomach; I am in love. I know I am in love when I cant wait to share some of the stupid things I did during the day with "him". It is mostly in my guts.

Girls Talk-He wanted you and seeked you out,but inside the relationship he's not been the guy you expected him to be,doesn't act like he's in it with you.How would you handle it?

Mostly when I put in work in the relationship I expect the same energy given back. But if the guy is not reciprocating same or have no clear intentions I let him go.

Girls Talk -How easy is it  for you to  let go?

I am a lady and deserves to be "chased" every day like he is still trying to  make me his woman. I  do not have the luxury of time to be left hanging with no clear cut intentions. I love certainty; its either we are both in or please don't waste my time. I don't force things to happen especially relationships, let nature do its work; if its meant to be it will totally happen. I would never waste a man's time and would appreciate if mine is not wasted either. Where I don't get what I want, I channel the same energy into another...I would never force love to happen. Men always know when a lady is the "one" I would never give a man the satisfaction   of tagging me as being too "up in his face or business". You cannot force a man to commit. If a guy truly loves you, you don't have to teach him how to treat you right or do the right things. I always know when its time to cut my loses and bolt.

Girls Talk-Thank you beautiful Fatima,next on the line is-Lets meet You Adorable

 I am Dolly Korede,28 and a Worker

Girls Talk-Tell us  what love means to you and when you know you're in love?

Firstly I'd like to say something about love.
Love is an intense feeling of deep affection, it is also a variety of different feelings, state and attitude with no limits or conditions for a person.

The feeling of love may not likely be  different from the feeling of infatuation but being persistent with it can actually tell what it is.

I know I am  in love when
1. I always think about him and want him around me at every point.
2. When my heart rate synchronises with his
3. I always want him to be happy irrespective of anything and
4. I just love everything about him and hardly finds faults not because there aren't faults but because the percentage of love  I have for him is high enough to cover his flaws.

Love can sometimes be crazy especially when you want someone that doesn't feel like he wants you back by reciprocating what you feel for him and in such a situation,I cannot pull  myself down for someone who doesn't find it interesting to stay in my  life. I don't run after a person who doesn't have an intense feeling for me.

If I find myself in a situation of loving someone so deep and I know in my  heart that I truly love this person  but he doesn't  reciprocate  or appreciate how  I  feel about him, I will
1. Accept the fact that he doesn't need  me
 2.Leave the dream about him behind and move on
3.I won't get angry with him or myself
4 I will Recognise that I can't control that person's emotion and I will express my  feelings to myself and get rid of his memories.

Girls Talk- There's no much difference on how  the Ladies view love,It's necessaLove?o appreciate the feelings of someone who truly loves us especially the person we seeked out ourselves,
If at any point we feel like what we thought was real doesn't feel same,its important we talk it over and agree on the next step instead of  abusing someone's emotion. "Don't hurt  a heart that chose to love you"

Feel free to drop your opinion on the topic  "When do you know you are in love?",let's do this again next week.
Stay Adorably Feminine.

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Monday, May 27, 2019

Closer To The Midnight Screams

 The only one my soul wants,the one my body yearns for,come in I invite you,I wait patiently, in full desire to be consumed by you,my passion is full and  burning ,it's all for you.

My fingers in your hair,your strong arms circle around my waist.come in and make love to me,my whole being yearns  for your masculine touch, my body and soul wants to be loved and taken.

My chest pressed softly to  yours,I could feel  your breath against my ear,so subtle.

There's no holding back in this sacred moment, it's a Paradise for you and I ,make love to my body,mind and soul ,till I'm spent,caress my body till my lids sticks together ,my lips shivers and my knees wobbles.

Your left hand held my back and drew me closer to you,your eyes fixed on mine
My lips became yours, it feels safe,it feels whole.a wonderful feeling, so alluring, so amazing.

How does it feel knowing there's a wonderful soul  needing you and you're needing all the tenderness?, we are all ready to give and to receive,without judgment we allow everything we feel empty  out ,our desires burn out and we are satisfied.
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